The chapter opens with Ana having a wet dream about being tied to a bed and smacked with a riding crop.  I’m not really sure how to react to this, because we’ve never seen her be particularly turned on by the thought of being hit before now.  Then again, I guess she could be really, really repressed and her dreams are where she’s allowed to experience things that she really wants to.  Sort of like the ‘inner goddess’ deal, where she feels all her sexuality has to be shunted off to the side.  But it rings false, because we have no hints in the narrative that Ana’s reactions are anything other than logical and expected.  It comes off instead as feeling like “Oh, women are just like that.  They want it, they just don’t/can’t admit it.  Go ahead and tie her up and hit her.  Eventually she’ll like it.” 

Fucking creepy.

Also, while I know it’s possible for women to orgasm while dreaming/thinking about sex, isn’t that something that has to be deliberately worked up to?  Ana is easiest woman the world to get off.  I’m surprised she doesn’t come every time she sits in a car.

Over breakfast, Kate practices her valedictorian speech while Ana angsts some more over Grey.  Then Ray shows up and actually gets to say words.  It’s still uncomfortable, because Ana practically genuflects over the fact that he showed up.  That’s all he’s done.  Just arrived, and he’s the bestest guy ever.  (Then again, her mother couldn’t even manage that much, so maybe Ana just has really low standards.)

I don’t mind if she really, really likes her father figure, but the book needs to actually make me like him, too.  I’m not impressed by the fact that he showed up.

Finally, it’s graduation time.  I’ve never been to a graduation at a traditional four-year school, so I can’t make much comment on the ceremony. 

On either side of me, I am joined by two girls whom I don’t know from a different faculty.

That word.  I don’t think it means what you think it means.  I think she meant college.  As in, the College of Liberal Arts, which would be what Ana is in.  WSU also has a College of Business, College of Education, College of Nursing, etc.

Research time!  Bah, I thought I knew something and I didn’t.  Turns out all the colleges graduate in the same ceremony at the WSU Vancouver campus.  They have three separate ones at the Pullman campus, though.  So the author finally got something right.

Christian shows up on the stage wearing the same tie that he used to tie up Ana twice now.  This makes Ana get the vapors, or something.  The girls around her get all giggly over how hot he is, then Ana tells them that he’s gay to…um, get rid of the competition?  Seriously, they’re just two random girls.  Does she think Grey is going to suddenly leave her in the lurch if someone else smiles at him?

Well, considering how those two got together, I wouldn’t put it past him.

(BTW, we get confirmation that this is set in 2011, and the text has the Chancellor as a man.  In 2011, the Chancellor at WSU Vancouver was a woman.  Minor point, but hell, why am I doing this if not to point out how very little research went into this book?)

Uhg, this is interminable.  In one paragraph, Ana gets all flustered because Grey is looking at her.  In the next paragraph, Ana gets all flustered because Grey isn’t looking at her anymore.

Then Grey gets up and gives a speech about wanting to end hunger in third-world countries, which seems a really…odd topic to give at a commencement ceremony.  He makes a passing comment about how he knows what it’s like to be very hungry, and apparently this sends Ana into a tail-spin.

My jaw falls to the floor. What? Christian was hungry once. Holy crap. Well, that ex­plains a great deal.

It explains his obsession with food, but not anything else.  In the grand scope of his fucked-upped-ness, I wouldn’t call that ‘a great deal.’

Turns out Grey was adopted at age four.  Ana spends a while being mentally outraged at the thought of poor, abused toddler Grey.  I hate the guy so much that I don’t care.

Here’s what I do care about, though.  BDSM is not a manifestation of trauma.  It’s not.  It’s a normal kink that is held by normal people.  Furthermore, if you’ve got severe issues that come from a shitty childhood, BDSM is probably one of the last ways that it would express, since it involves so much self-control, trust, and open, honest communication.  Granted, we’ve already covered all the ways in which Grey isn’t practicing BDSM, so who knows.  It might fit for him.  But this book isn’t making that distinction, and thousands of readers think this is all the same thing. 

Also, being a victim doesn’t excuse asshole behavior.  Like, at all.  It’s sad and tragic and I would never say that trauma is the fault of the person who suffered it.  But there’s a huge difference between saying “This is all your fault” and saying “Dude, you need to get help so that you don’t continue the cycle and hurt others.”  Some people are handed a harder lot in life than others, and that’s very unfair, but no one is handed a free pass to rape and abuse.

Grey and Ana have a whole conversation on the stage while he hands her the diploma.  Weird, weird book.

After the ceremony, Grey calls Ana over and takes her to an empty room, where  he locks the door.  Seems he’s pissed off that she didn’t return his calls, texts, or emails.  On her graduation day.  When she rightfully should be spending her time with family and friends.  Apparently Grey was worried about her because he thinks her car is a deathtrap, and when she didn’t answer his emails, he figured she’d died.  Look, it’s a bit rusty, but people drive old cars all the time.  They can even run great if properly cared for, which hers is.  I think he’s just looking for an excuse to keep constant tabs on her, like the stalker that he is.

Grey demands an answer from her by the next day, and I really want to slap him for it.  I mean, there is a sense of “I can’t wait around forever and if this isn’t going to work out, I want to be cut free so I can go seek something that will work.”  But he’s given her less than a week, and a lot to absorb, and he’s telling her this like it’s an ultimatum.  ANSWER ME OR ELSE.  Like that.  Plus, you know, there’s all the rape she still hasn’t processed yet.

Ana says she has Ray to deal with today and she wants to leave to be with him.  Grey wants to meet Ray.  Ana doesn’t want to introduce them, because she can’t tell Ray that they are having kinky sex.  Ana, honey, you do know that most people don’t introduce their significant others by their sexual preferences, right?  I mean, there aren’t people all over the country right now saying “Mom, Dad, this is Phil.  He likes to do it with me on top.  He may or may not be my boyfriend.  It’s hard to tell at the moment, because we haven’t had that ‘state of the relationship’ talk.” 

Why does she even have to tell Ray who he is at all?  She could just introduce him as Christian Grey and leave it at that.

Apparently Ana’s subconscious wears ‘wing-shaped spectacles.’  This gimmick gets stupider every time it’s used. 

Ray’s last name is Steele.  How did that work?  Did he adopt Ana after marrying her mom?  Is that why they share a last name?  Did Ana change her last name with each new husband, and then upon turning 18 just decide she liked ‘Steele’ best?  Because otherwise, Ana should have her real dad’s last name.  Or her mom’s maiden name, if they weren’t married. 

Kate’s brother shows up.  Apparently he’s sexy, too.  I guess only the rich people get to be sexy in Ana’s world, while the Pauls and the Joses only get to be boy-next-door looking.

Kate and Grey show up at the same time, and Kate introduces Gray as ‘Ana’s boyfriend.’  I’m still failing to see what the drama is here.  People lie to their parents about the people they’re fucking all the time.  It’s like she assumes that if she tells Ray something, that makes it true, or at least worth fretting over.  She’s not even angsting about lying to him, just over the fact that Kate used the word ‘boyfriend.’

Kate and Ethan leave, Gray and Ray start talking about fishing, and Ana leaves to go find Kate and berate her.  I’m kind of sick of reading Kate’s full name.  Katherine Kavanagh.  It’s like the author is so proud of it and doesn’t want us to forget it.  More musical characters as Ray leaves and Ana ends up with Grey again.

And then they flirt.  It’s exactly like every other time they flirt.  For a book that’s this horrid, it’s amazing how often I end up bored.

Ana admits that she wants ‘more,’ meaning ‘hearts and flowers,’ and Grey reiterates that he can’t do that.  Only he quite literally says ‘can’t.’  ‘Doesn’t know how.’  As if BDSM and romance are antithesis to each other.  I’m not surprised by this point, but I am still ticked off.  Well, as soon as he says ‘no’ and touches her back a little, Ana forgets all her I need more talk and tells him yes to the contract deal.

Because when has Ana ever stuck to her guns about anything?  Other than the food list.

Later, after Ray drops Ana off at home, she invites Grey over to ‘talk.’  She gets out her uber-expensive books to give back to him and writes another quote on the wrapping paper.

“I agree to the conditions, Angel; because you know best what my punishment ought to be; only – only – don’t make it more than I can bear!”

So, I looked up a summary of Tess online to see why she keeps pulling quotes from the damn book.  I think that this author, if she ever read the actual book, completely misunderstood the whole thing.  Like with the Bluebeard thing, I can see Grey as Alec very easily.  I just can’t see why the author would want to draw that allusion.