This book is taking too long.  The chapters just drag on and on and on.  They’re stuffed with fail, but none of the fail is related to the plot, what little there is of said plot.  We’ve 31 chapters left, and I don’t want to still be doing this come February.  So, I’m going to let some of the fail go unmolested, summarize a bit more, and just hit the high points so I can get two chapters out on most days. 

Matthew takes her to his laboratory the next day, and (surprise, surprise) it looks like a laboratory.  He says he’s studying evolution there, just like a bunch of other labs across the country.

The difference between our lab and the rest is that humans aren’t the only species we’re studying.”

…so, you’re assuming that every other genetic/evolution lab in the country is…only studying human DNA?

What Matthew means is that he’s studying creatures, but wow, he went stupid about it.  Another vampire shows up, makes a crass comment, and then says that he can smell the adrenaline on her.  Even though Diana has done nothing but stand there and make a wry comment.  No nerves, or sweating, or desire to run, or really any hint – through showing or telling – that she’s afraid of this guy at all.

This author just really doesn’t get anxiety disorders, does she?  Apparently they aren’t actually an impact on one’s life, because while in the middle of one, you can stand around and calmly discuss it so long as you plan to run the next morning.  Or some bullshit like that.

Ah.  Apparently adrenaline is like sugar and crack all rolled in to one for vampires, and that’s why Matthew likes to sniff her.  Still doesn’t excuse the idiocy and Diana’s complete lack of any hardship presented by her ‘condition.’

Matthew’s two lab assistants (Miriam and a new guy named Marcus) stick around while he explains stuff to Diana.  He gives her a file with news stories about a bunch of murders from around the world, and somehow this ‘proves’ that vampires in ‘species deterioration,’ because the deaths are failed vampire transformations.  Huh, to give the book credit, that’s one I haven’t seen before.  I wish we’d gotten this bit sooner; it’s a hell of a lot more interesting than yoga class.

They go on to spout off a bunch of technical stuff about mitochondrial DNA and Darwin that I don’t feel qualified to judge as stupid or not.  End result is that all creatures are deteriorating, not just vampires, and apparently it’s because they “pushed aside” their magic…but no one bothers to tell us why they did that.  Apparently, right now 10% of the population is creature, but it used to be 50%. 

So, at some point in the past, half the plant was some sort of fantastical creature and was either genius, magic-slinger, or immortal super-strong vampire.  They specifically state that the decreased urge to mate/inability to mate is a result of these DNA changes, which are a result of having to hide magic.  What no one brings up, however, is why they had to hide that magic in the first place.  Fear of humans loses a lot of credibility when we’re talking about half the planet.  Back at that point, if witches came out of hiding and humans didn’t like that?  So what!  The only excuse that could possibly be given for why humans are a threat is numerical superiority, and that’s just been taken off the table.  So why did they hide?  Why weren’t the open about their magic?  What forced them into going underground?

Oh, joy, it seems creatures have 24 chromosome pairs instead of 23.  And yet they can mate with humans, somehow.  Wasn’t this part of Twilight, or am I thinking of some other science fail from that book?

Blah, blah, blah, a bunch of technical talk about DNA and mutations and is this going to be relevant?  Will there be a test later?  I hope not, because it’s all flying over my head.  I don’t mind a bit of technical jargon if it’s character-building or going to be related to the plot somehow, but this feels like just showing off.

Diana offers to give them a blood sample to help with their research, since she’s the ‘last Bishop’ and apparently that’s a big deal.  They act like the blood test is some huge deal that’s going to reveal intimate details of her powers, which I’m sure it will, I’m just not sure why this is something that requires so much angst. 

“And is it really true we’re four distinct species, or do daemons, humans, vampires, and witches share a common ancestor?”

…do you think those options are mutually exclusive?

“If you prove we aren’t different species, but only different lineages within the same species, it will change everything,” I warned.

This would be a hell of a lot more dramatic if we knew anything about the world to begin with.  What would change?  Does it need to be changed?  In what way would it change?  Is there anything to change?  We still haven’t heard about any sort of over-arching governing body, just small family/coven units among witches.  Or perhaps there is no governing body, and that is the problem?

I think the author is getting bored with her own subjects.  After the lab adventure, she breezes over yoga class in a paragraph.  Though, a paragraph of useless information is still one paragraph too much.  Afterwards, Matthew invites her to dinner the next night, and oh god not another dinner date.

I’m going to need a padded desk if this keeps going on.  Slamming my head on a hard surface so many times can’t be good for me.