Mara agrees to Noah’s “let me try” statement without having any idea what such a vague request even means, and then he drives her home.

“I like [opening the car door] for you. Try to remember so I don’t have to sprint every time.”

[…]

“I’m picking you up tomorrow morning,” Noah said

[…]

Noah placed a finger on my lips. “Don’t. Don’t ask me why. It’s annoying. I want to. That’s it. That’s all. So let me.” Noah’s face was so close. So close.

Focus, Mara. “Everyone’s going to think that we’re together.”

“Let them,” he said as his eyes searched my face.

“But—”

“But nothing. I want them to think that.”

Holy fuck, how did you fit so much creepy into less than a page?

Noah has literally zero fucks to give about Mara’s thoughts, feelings, opinions, or even just her confusion. He declares what they are going to do, declares that he wants everyone to view them as a couple without asking if she wants that as well, and doesn’t even want explain anything to her because “it’s annoying.”

Noah wants Mara to be a silent little doll of a girlfriend who just goes with the flow that he decides on, who doesn’t even need to understand, much less consent to stuff.

Then he leaves.

Something was starting between us. But it would finish me if it ended.

So we’ve reached this point in the standard clichéd plotline, eh? It hasn’t gotten any better than all the other books we’ve seen it in.

Mara confronts Daniel about telling Noah stuff.

“Okay, hold on a second here. First of all, the only thing I told him was why we moved from Laurelton. There was an accident, your friends died, and we moved to start over. You don’t have the monopoly on that explanation, so relax.” I opened my mouth to protest but Daniel continued. “Second, he’s a good guy.”

I agreed with him, but didn’t want to. “Other people don’t think so,” I said instead.

“Other people are usually wrong.”

To the first point: Daniel has a fair argument. It is, really, the whole family’s story once the whole family has to move. I mean, what is Daniel supposed to say when people ask him why he’s new in town? “Oh, well, stuff happened, you should ask my sister.”

Second, wow, that is the shittiest argument I’ve ever heard in my life. “Everyone else is saying he does stuff, so I’m going to believe the exact opposite because obviously this large group of people are all wrong! Large groups of people are always all wrong.” What a terrible argument to make, since the exact opposite is actually true and on top of that it’s common enough for teenagers to ignore warnings from others because “psh, I know better!” Don’t reinforce that mindset.

If everyone you meet tells you that a certain guy is a manipulative player, fucking listen to them.

Daniel explains how he met Noah. Apparently Noah is a gifted musician. (What was that earlier about him not having any passions and feeling driftless in life? Can you really reach the level of “super gifted composer” and not care about music?)

Have you made any other friends since we’ve been here?”

I gave him the death stare. “Yes, actually.”

“Who? I want a name.”

“Jamie Roth.”

“The Ebola kid? I heard he’s a little unstable.”

“That was one incident.”

“Not what I’ve heard.”

First: no, Jamie is a horrible person.

Second: Daniel, do you believe “everyone” or not?

The next morning Mara gets ready for school and sees that her mom has set out one of her pills. Since she’s upset about fainting at the art show and wants to avoid a repeat, she goes ahead and takes it.

I hated the thought of taking it—hated . But the art show debacle was scary, not to mention the bathtub incident last week. And I didn’t want to freak out in front of Noah again. I just wanted to be normal for him. For my family.

She…simultaneously thinks that the pills will work and also doesn’t want to take them? I mean, that’s certainly possible thanks to concerns about overmedication and side effects, as well as just hating the need to take medicine. But we’ve never heard Mara say anything about any of those issues, so…??? What’s her problem? Really, I honestly want to know.

A lot of shit in this book just feels incomplete, like the author knew all these details but forgot to actually put them in the book in any capacity, so even though things could make sense they’re kind of half-formed ideas instead. Why does Mara resist mental health care? Why is she afraid of ghosts? Is it some especial fear, or the normal kind? Why does she hate her pills? All of these things are reasonable, but they’re so sketchy with all their missing details.

IDK, maybe the ghost thing is reading too far into things. But it would still help me if she’d just say “I’ve always hated ghost stories, so creepy.” Mostly because this is a paranormal book, and while in any other book I would assume “creepy stories are creepy” and be done with it, in this book there’s every possibility that something else is going on and I’d like to know if this is normal or supernatural aversion.

“I’ve always hated ghost stories” is very different from “I’ve never really had a problem with ghost stories, but man that Ouija board is throwing off some bad vibes.”

Mara runs into her father for half a page of reminding us that other people exist in this novel. Barely. Then Noah shows up.

These were the things that added up to Noah that morning, from bottom to top:

Shoes: gray Chucks.

Pants: charcoal tweed.

Shirt: slim cut, untucked, thin and pinstriped dress shirt. Super skinny tie, knotted loose around his open collar, exposing the shadow of a screen-printed t-shirt beneath it.

Days unshaven: somewhere between three and five.

Half-smile: treacherous.

Eyes: blue and infinite.

Hair: a beautiful, beautiful mess.

I…have no words for how useless and poorly presented all of this is.

Do we really need to know about his shoes?

Could the words spend on his shoes be given to fleshing out the dad’s court case subplot?

And then Noah ties her shoes for her, because apparently she forgot. He really doesn’t want her to have even the least bit of autonomy, does he? Even shoe tying is too much to give over to her.

They get to school and Mara is still nervous about what people will say. Noah assures her that he’ll stay with her all day, even though…that’s just going to make people talk more? Then in the parkinglot they pass a group of guys who start making sexual comments about Mara.

Noah was no longer by my side when I turned. He had Kent from Algebra pinned against the car.

“I should injure you considerably,” he said in a low voice.

NOT. FUCKING. SEXY.

First: This is the first time in the book anyone has been this crude so it’s fairly obvious that it’s only in here for the sake of showcasing Noah’s reaction. Really shitty reason to include something like this, book.

Second: Any guy who’s first reaction to words is violence is not a guy you should be around. Ever. I really don’t know how else to explain this. His first reaction to someone saying words is violence. Very fast violence, no hesitation. That’s an indication of a long-time habit, and if it’s a habit that means that’s how he’s going to treat you.

I understand the appeal of a big strong man getting into a fight to defend some honor. I really do. I’ve used it myself a time or two. But you have to set it up better than this. My preferred method is to have the romantic lead try to diffuse the situation and let the other guy get physical first.

After the others try to talk him down, Kent makes one single more comment so Noah punches him in the face and breaks his nose. Then he tells Mara that it was “worth it.” Never ever ever ever ever ever date a guy who thinks that breaking someone’s nose is a proper “worth it” punishment for the oh-so-devious crime of talking.

Noah gets sent to the office and then meets up with her after class to announce that he has a two-day suspension starting after midterms are over.

I laughed. “That was not for me. That was you marking your territory,”

Yes. Exactly true.

Oh, that’s all you’ve got to say on the matter? You’re just going to move on as if that’s not incredibly creepy? Fuck this book.

Also, Noah has a perfect GPA. Not really sure how since he keeps skipping classes in order to creep on Mara.

Seriously, do you not know how much work that takes to achieve, especially in a private school that apparently is more challenging that your regular public school system? What happened to Noah’s “I don’t care about anything” so-called-problem?

Mara and Jamie meet up for math class and talk about her new love life. Anna comes by to gloat about how she’ll be dumped soon. Which, really, seems pretty mild considering that’s Noah’s pattern in general, isn’t it?

After class people keep knocking into her.

Jamie crouched with me. “You’re unraveling the very fabric of Croyden society.”

“What are you talking about?” I shoved my things into my messenger bag with unnecessary force.

“Noah drove you to school.”

Yeah, so, the story has officially devolved into a “Noah is the center of the universe” parade.

“He’s acting like your boyfriend. Which makes the girls he treated like condoms a trifle jealous.”

“Condoms?” I asked, confused.

“Used once and then discarded.”

“Gross.”

“He is.”

On the one hand, Jamie I hate you. On the other hand, book I hate you for perpetuating the idea that girls all operate on a system of hatred and jealousy. On the third hand, why the fuck is Mara dating such an unrelenting asshole?

Mara meets up with Noah again and confronts him about dating Anna, but Noah claims that they never dated (or had sex), just that Anna “attached” herself to him and he allowed it until she got too annoying.

I…I really just…fucking hate everything in the world right now.

It’s bad enough that the book is attempting to exonerate the love interest by further bashing another woman. Why did you feel the need to vilify her more in order to lessen his guilt? On top of that, why is this something that needs to be done at all? Why is dating Anna something he needs to be “absolved” of? Why do you think that Anna is so reprehensible that anyone associated with her is also “tainted,” to the point where you have to alter your own history in order to make Noah look “better”?

And then there’s the fact that Anna’s story doesn’t really make sense if they never dated. She supposedly did a personality 180 because of this guy and that–

Fuck. Fuck this book. Is it really trying to say that Noah’s hotness and general seductive aura are so entrancing that it can make girls lose their fucking minds just by existing in the same general vicinity and that it has nothing to do with his actions?

I hate everything so fucking hard right now.

Screw the rest of this chapter. There’s more creepy bullshit and they make out, okay?