Dain carries Violet out of the gym and all the way to the infirmary, while Violet scolds him for ‘letting everyone know he cares about her.’

Yeah, I think the boat’s already sailed on that point. Also, while fraternizing with your chain of command should present a problem and it’s right to worry about that, it just…never does. No problems ever come of it. Kind of makes all the hubbub feel pointless in retrospect.

In the infirmary, Violet is recognized by the healers because thanks to her EDS she’s in there all the time. Winifred, a healer she’s very familiar with, calls for another guy who can use magic to fix people. ‘Mending’ is a very rare dragon-given talent, which is why there’s only the one magic guy here and everyone else is a normal doctor.

Dain is against Violet getting magic-mended, to everyone’s shock.

“I don’t want her in pain – that’s why we’re here. But if she’s injured this severely, surely we can see if the scribes will take her as a late admission. It’s only been a day.”

Throughout this book I can’t tell if it’s normally possible to switch jobs, or if Dain is trying to break some rules here. Because Dain is the only one who ever mentions it, and everyone else just sort of…dies.

As his reasoning for not wanting a mender sinks in, my anger is able to pierce through the pain long enough for me to bite out, “I’m not going to the scribes.”

…why? And is it anger at him wanting you to stay injured or anger at him wanting you to leave?

Multiple times in this scene, Dain asks her to at least try to leave, and she flatly says no. The only reason she gives is that her mom would force her back. Dain gives up in defeat, and Violet gets her magical mending.

I make my way back later that night, my throbbing right arm cradled in a light-blue sling that makes me an even bigger target, if that’s possible.

Slings say weak. Slings say breakable.

First of all, tons of people got injured in that weird little free-for-all you call sparring, so you don’t exactly stand out.

Second and more delicately…

I tried to find reviews from people who have EDS before I started writing this. I’m sure there’s a lot more than what I found because googling just doesn’t do it as well these days, but from what I did read people are pretty split. There’s people who found real joy in seeing themselves reflected in Violet’s descriptions of her feelings, and then there’s people who felt terribly upset by the depiction of EDS in this book. And I don’t want to take away from the first category, but I’m kind of siding with the second one because of things like the above quote.

This feeling of needing to push oneself and not appear weak comes up again and again throughout the book, and I think the worst mark against the book is that it…works. Violet pushes herself through pain, through injury, and…gets better at stuff. Feeling pressure to push through disability is something a lot of disabled people deal with, and yeah, it can come along with a great deal of trauma because you are constantly piling more pain on top of yourself that isn’t needed. One reviewer I found mentioned almost dying before getting a proper EDS diagnosis because of this attitude right here.

And when we get disability rep like Violet here who pushes through pain successfully, it really doesn’t help either the disabled community (who might have already internalized that bullshit) or the abled community (who already expects that shit from disabled people).

The author has EDS and so does one of her children. From the descriptions and the emotions that are centered on Violet’s disability, it’s clear that she’s put a lot of herself on the page. But disabled people can still have internalized ableism and, uh… nah, I’m just going to be snarky about it.

This author did ‘write what you know’ and put down the experience of a sedentary person with EDS but in the setting of a military school and there is some wild disconnect going on with that, although we’ll come across that more later. So far it’s just mildly weird.

Once back to her bunk, Violet finds a present from Mira under her pillow. It’s a journal that Brennan (dead brother) wrote for Mira to help guide her through dragon school. It’s full of tips and tricks from both Brennan and Mira for her to lean on.

The first bit of advice we get from the journal is that challenges are decided in advance and if you’re sneaky you can go find the board where it’s all written down and know who you’re going to fight. ‘Challenges’ are sparring matches like we’ve already seen. But also the only thing they ever do? You just show up once a week and get told to fight people and then outside of that, ??? “Eh, ‘Professor’ is more of an honorary title, I don’t actually teach anything.”

Next chapter, Violet is sneaking outside at night. One of the few books that Violet brought with her across the Death Bridge is a book of poisons, and she’s using that and her knowledge of the area to gather up some non-lethal provisions. She climbs a tree to get the berries she’s after, and on the way down she notices Xaden standing under the tree. She avoids moving further down and hopes to go unnoticed.

Soon, a bunch of other students show up. They’re all marked kids, and for a moment Violet thinks that they must be meeting to plot traitorous plots. But it quickly becomes clear that they are just gathering to offer mutual support and advice. Because of an assumption that traitor kids be traitoring, they aren’t allowed to gather in groups openly.

“Now, someone give me a problem I can actually solve,” Xaden orders.

“Battle Brief,” a first-year I recognize says softly. […] “It’s not that I can’t keep up, but the information…” She shrugs.

[…]

“You learn what they teach you,” Xaden says to the first-year, his voice taking a hard edge. “Keep what you know but recite whatever they tell you to.”

Just wanted to point out this little bit of actual good foreshadowing.

Talk turns to Violet and how they all want to kill her for revenge over their own parents being killed. Well, almost all, a couple point out that she didn’t do anything. Xaden shuts down talk by saying that he’ll be in charge of ‘dealing with’ Violet and they all accept that.

They disperse and Violet comes out of the tree, only to find Xaden still there waiting for her. He knew she was there because his special signet power is to control shadows. The parameters of this power are never explained because later he can use ‘shadows’ to murder people and lift things and ????????????? I can accept a loose magic system but having shadows do literally anything you want is a bit beyond the pale.

Violet assumes he’s going to murder her, but he just snarks and japes while she pulls out some knives and throws them. Seems she has circus-performer level accuracy because…fantasy book. She doesn’t hit him, however, just makes a point.

Xaden is unperturbed, gives her knives back, and suggests she scare the shit out Jack so he’ll leave her alone. The whole time Violet is in her head talking about how hot he is and also how deadly he is, how he’ll kill her at any point, and he…leaves. Gets a promise that she won’t tell about their meeting and then leaves. Continues, as he has from minute one, to be just a little snarky and nothing else and then leave.

Everyone who calls this enemies-to-lovers needs a real thorough talking-to.

Next up, it’s the day of Violet’s first Stupid Fight and she’s on breakfast duty. She volunteered for it because she’s a morning person and also so she can poison folks before a fight. Dain is there to walk her to her job because he wants to hang out. There is much banter, he begs her to run away again, the end.

Skip forward to Violet in an academic class that’s teaching her about the different types of dragons. They all follow a naming convention of “Color Weapon-tail.” Red Daggertail, Orange Clubtail, etc. Not the most creative, but hey, over here in reality we’ve got a whole term for that kind of shit. Tautonyms. So, can’t really complain.

Xaden’s dragon is one of the rarest and scariest types, because of course. Why not.

They go over the types of dragons that will be available this year. A black dragon is mentioned, he’s also very rare, there’s only two of them and the other one bonded to the Scary General. So, of course, we’ll see him again. Dun dun dun.

Also for background, the dragons are sentient and adult, and they only come to bond with a human when they volunteer for it. Dragons form a telepathic bond with their chosen humans. When a human dies, the dragon can go on to bond with another human, although each dead rider is harder and harder on them until at some point they die when their rider does. Riders, however, 100% die when their bonded dragon goes first.

Dragons are big and scary and make wards and stomp on enemies. So it’s clear what the humans get out of this arrangement. It is unclear what the dragons get, if anything. Only 100 have volunteered this year, which is less than previous years.

The wards are faltering at a rate that makes my stomach tense every time Professor Devera starts out daily Battle Brief. Either we’re weakening or our enemies are getting stronger. Both possibilities mean the cadets in this room are needed more than ever.

Even me.

Possibly…even the 70-odd people that fell off the Death Bridge?

Next we get the Sparring Match That Isn’t Sparring Because It’s Legal to Kill You. Dain is worried because he knows that her opponent wants her dead, thinking she’s weak and a liability. Guh, having a failure option in this school would be so much more sensical. Then you don’t have (sorry, ‘have’) to kill the weak, you just drum them out and send them to a different job.

Also how convenient that this attitude only comes up when she’s already prepared for it. I guess attacking Violet is only against the rules when she’s actually vulnerable. Handy, that.

Jack starts heckling her, so Violet takes Xaden’s advice and throws knives at him to scare him. Again, not hitting him, just hitting close enough to make a point. It only partially works, he at least leaves the room.

It’s time for Violet’s fight, and her opponent is slow and sick thanks to the poison she put in his breakfast. She easily beats him and takes his dagger as a prize. It was never stated before that you get to take knives, but it’s treated as normal from here on out, so…uh, great editing.

The knife is heavier and longer than my others, but it’s mine now, and I earned it.

Throughout the book Violet will mainly use knives to throw at people and she has unerring accuracy. But here we see that her knives, and the collection she will eventually get, are a mixture of different sizes and weights and balances. Also, they aren’t throwing knives. They’re just…knives. You don’t throw a regular knife unless you want to look like a fucking dweeb who watches too many marvel movies. It’s not going to fly straight, it’s not going to spin right (or at all), and it won’t go as far. Her original four knives aren’t described, but considering she shifts easily from poking people to throwing, I’m fairly certain this book has no idea throwing knives are a specific thing.

We get a summary of the next several weeks and all the opponents that she poisons so that they suck when fighting her. She doesn’t come out completely unscathed though.

[…]tossing me to the mat and delivering some overwhelmingly painful kicks to my abdomen that leave colorful contusions and one distinct boot print on my ribs. I almost broke down and went to see Nolon [magic healer] after that, but I gritted my teeth and wrapped my ribs, determined not to give the others a reason to weed me out like Jack or any marked ones wanted.

1) More grit and bear it bullshit.

2) Uh…that sounds like injuries anyone would get tho? I mean, you could claim to be particularly weak if this was the sparing we know in the real world and that happened, but y’all are just straight wailing on each other and in that circumstance literally everyone would have sore ribs?

Finally there’s a week where Violet screws up and poisons her opponent a little too hard. The woman gets sick before the match and misses it. Instead of getting to skip a week, however, Xaden volunteers to spar with her. Dun dun dun.