Cassie slowly wakes up to realize that everyone has been knocked unconscious, and also Ax is there pointing a gun at them.  Well, the alien version of a gun. And now I’m just randomly wondering…why do they never steal guns from the Yeerks?  Ax has one here, and they’re visually similar enough that Cassie makes…

Cassie goes full-on vulcan mind meld with the whale, because…whales are only cool if they’re fucking magical?  Or something?  I don’t know, but it’s really irritating.  Why can’t whales just be cool for being cool?  Why add in all this hippy crap?  Anyway, they swap life stories and Cassie learns whale knowledge. Marco remorphs into…

First up:  Bragging time! Okay, with that out of the way, on to the review. After the beach incident, the kids all split up and go their separate ways for a while.  Also, apparently Rachel’s mom won a “Lawyer of the Year” award, which is probably the most bland award ever.  Really, it sounds like…

GUYS!  GUESS WHAT?  WE GET TO MEET AX IN THIS BOOK!  YAAAAAAAAAAY! Of course, the trade-off is that Cassie narrates.  Today’s pointless book opener is Cassie out in the barn and morphing a squirrel just for the lolz.  Because a few books ago we had concerns about a morphing limit, and no one has resolved…

Everyone promptly gets freaked out over the arrival of Visser Three, and Tobias points out that their brilliant plan of just walking down to the lake to morph there isn’t going to work.  Really, guys?  That was your plan?  Openly walk down to the lake?  Huh, I just realized we don’t really have a good…